During and after school closures, parents have become more involved in their children's education, whether intentionally or unintentionally. According to many, even more than teachers and parents would have wished for.
Parents have always been an essential part of the educational system. We care deeply because they are our children, and we raise them by setting an example and creating suitable conditions for their growth and development. In current circumstances, with no other role models (friends, relatives, teachers) from whom to learn in the same way, the role of parents is more crucial than ever before. However, this task is neither easy (many might not even realize it) nor straightforward. It must be carried out alongside work at home or in the workplace. Balancing remote work, establishing a learning rhythm for children, taking care of family meals, nurturing, actively assisting the youngest in preparing their learning space, reading instructions is a daily challenge for many parents.
The learning environment in school is co-created by students and teachers, and at home, it's co-created by children and parents. As parents are usually not trained in teaching, we can only rely on our (almost forgotten) school experiences and instinct about what is "good and right" for our child. Therefore, during school closures, a genuine tribute was paid to all parents who, alongside their jobs, took on the demanding role of a teacher. Overnight, you became one of the pillars of the primary education system. Your children and teachers need you! While providing academic support, we may unintentionally make mistakes. Let's take these mistakes as opportunities for learning and finding more effective strategies to support our children's learning.
For instance, parents often provide answers to questions either as part of assignments given by teachers or when children face questions while learning. Remember, the journey is more important than the destination! Thus, encourage your child not to know something, to be uncertain, and instead provide them with additional questions and hints to stimulate their exploration and contemplation. Instead of immediately providing answers on a silver platter, encourage them to experience the "Aha!" moment when finding the right solution. Experience matters! Did you know that we only retain about 20% of what we hear, 30% of what we hear and see, about 50% of what we do ourselves, and more than 85% of what we can explain to others? Let your child explain to you instead (you'll find that you're less tired too!).
Correcting mistakes with a red pen... We all remember the school notebooks we brought home with corrected mistakes... Does this image leave you with pleasant or unpleasant memories of school days? Well, today's children don't like such corrections either. Leave this task to the teacher. It's okay to not know something in school (sometimes even cool...). Children are at school to learn. If the child completes a task on their own, you'll also help the teachers by providing them with insight into where the students are on the path to the goal. This will enable them to better adjust their future work, activities, and teaching to lead the students towards the goal. If we receive parental answers and correct solutions from children, teachers may mistakenly believe that the students already understand the material.
Younger children often like to show their creations, drawings, learned songs, and essays to adults. They want feedback on their work or achievements. It's easy and quick to respond with a "Bravo!" or "Wow, what a beautiful picture!" This way, they get accustomed (like in Pavlov's famous experiment) to everything they do being excellent. And when they receive disapproving feedback at school for the first time (and the next time), they don't know how to handle it. They feel hurt and give up before they've even completed the learning task.
Instead, learn together with your child – the language of learning. Questions can be helpful: What did you learn today (not: what did you do)? Which goal did you achieve (not: what grade did you get)? What learning strategy did you use (not: you haven't completed the assignment yet, or: go study)? How do you know you've achieved your goal (not: you haven't copied, completed... yet)? What mistake did you make today, and what did you learn from it (instead of copying solutions)? What feedback about your knowledge did you receive from the teacher or a classmate, and how did you (or will you) use it (instead of giving up or abandoning learning)? Where did you get stuck, or how will you overcome the challenge (instead of asking a classmate to send you the solutions)?
Therefore, guide children towards self-assessment. Questions like: Are you satisfied with the picture you drew? What do you like most about it? What are you proud of? What did you do well? What do you think could be improved? (These are questions we all wish to hear, not just at school but also in the workplace...) So, let's start with ourselves, as we are role models for our children.
Published in Delo, 24.11.2020: https://www.delo.si/mnenja/gostujoce-pero/pot-je-pomembnejsa-od-cilja/ (19.7.2023)